The Tranny Times

Best for TGIF

2010-05-14T12:52:00.003-04:00

Yes, Journey made it famous, Glee took it over and now we have a Ga-Elton-and Co. performance. The YMCA can finally take a back seat as #1 gay-vintage anthem.

Must See : Lagerfeld's Remember Now

2010-05-13T09:48:00.002-04:00

If you haven't yet, jump over to Chanel-News and see Karl Lagerfeld's newest short film "Remember Now". It's a hot tale of cool kids in San Tropez. Love a good branded entertainment (double Cs and boucle for days); love a good Lagerfeld cameo.

Love a Good Sample Sale

2010-05-13T09:47:00.003-04:00

Opening Ceremony's sample sale starts today at the Howard Street location. You better werq!

Best for Summer Entertaining

2010-05-12T09:40:00.011-04:00

Even the trashiest of trannies knows that the well-appointed home is key for happiness. But what about the throughly thought-out beach house? With Fire Island looming, our attention turns to poolside entertaining. Face it, FIP is about the beach, the teas, the houses, and the romance (no matter how brief or sandy). But it's also about putting your lifestyle on display. The quarter share crowd can be as uppity as any UES dowager so you can't expect your landlord's standard issue Ikea to pass muster at your afternoon cocktail party. This is why we love LAPlates. The online mom and pop shop rolled out their first collection of monogrammable, customizable, melamine plates 2006 and have grown their products to include super-cool coasters, cups and cutting boards ideal for slicing lemons on the lanai. Most importantly, LAPlates are a green solution to glass-free entertaining; no more wasteful and ugly disposables.

Best for Day 39

2010-05-11T11:56:00.004-04:00

We all love a good Ga! Even the little straight(ish) 6th grade boys. This homage shows off his own style as well as his fairly advanced keyboard skills. Pay no attention to the horrified looks coming from the girls in the background, they are clearly just jealous.

Shoes 8

2010-05-07T10:20:00.005-04:00

"You can always tell a tranny by her shoes." In "Shoes", TTT gives a stage to the foundation of any fabulous outfit: the boots, loafers, clogs and heels that we all put on each day.With Memorial Day just three weeks away, it's time to start considering white shoes in the city. A white leather lace-up transitions well on summer fridays from the office to the LIRR.

Best for Friday

2010-05-07T09:34:00.005-04:00

You know summer is well on its way when the new roof installation at the Met has opened. Here is what the Met has to say:

"The monumental bamboo structure, ultimately measuring 100 feet long, 50 feet wide, and 50 feet high, will take the form of a cresting wave that bridges realms of sculpture, architecture, and performance."

It's a great place to meet friends after work. Have a drink, mingle, network and enjoy the beautiful views before the heat was you sweating through your lightweight cashmere.

Must See : Gaga on American Idol

2010-05-06T12:43:00.003-04:00

According to WWD, you can expect to see Gaga on tonight's "American Idol" wearing this little Armani number. The Ga and The Gio have developing quite a relationship; Armani said that Gaga is a, “modern phenomenon who has proved to be fascinating, and whose every appearance is a piece of theatre.” Gaga wore Armani to the Grammy Awards and this week's Costume Institute Gala.

Spotted @ Valentino for Flowers, Chic & Cheap

2010-05-05T06:49:00.012-04:00

Last night, Elle Décor editor at large, Carlos Mota, celebrated the launch of his new book, Flowers Cheap & Chic, with a party at the Valentino showroom on Madison and 65th St. The space provided a crisp, airy backdrop for the fete featuring full-bloom florals and very pretty people. SPOTTED sipping hibiscus-themed vodka cocktails at Valentino . . . our favorite RHONY, Kelly Kiloran Bensimon . . . designers Douglas Hannant, and Adam Lippes of ADAM, both with boyfriends . . . Paul Sevigny playing DJ. . . InStyle's Hal Rubenstein . . . ad man and friend of the author, Mark Daniel . . . career socials, Zani Gugelmann, Amanda Hearst, Allison Sarofim and Fabiola Beracasa, who confessed to TTT, "I am exhausted after last night [The Costume Institute's American Woman Gala]. I was at the Boom Boom Room until 4!" . . .

Purge: Smartphone Lunches

2010-05-04T15:08:00.004-04:00

Yes, we are ALL guilty of this, whether it be during a weekday lunch with coworkers or at Sunday brunch with your beau and co.: phones on the table. Up close and personal, they have become the centerpiece of most dining establishments around New York. It's time to put them away kiddies. Really, it only a disservice to yourself; take a break from everyone else's business (including work) for an hour a day. Enjoy a little face time and your chicken salad sandwich. Just think of how many BBMs you will have to look forward to when you get back to the office.

Best for Saturday Retail

2010-04-30T09:58:00.004-04:00

With forecasted highs in the upper 80s, Jonathan Adler could not have picked a better day to celebrate spring than tomorrow. Luckly for him, New York weather will provide a perfect backdrop for his in-store soirées across the city. Pop in for 15% off, plus snacks and cocktails. If you're lucky, you may meet the man himself. Love a cocktail, love a sale!

Worst for Day : Countess LuAnn's "Money Can't Buy You Class"

2010-04-27T09:46:00.010-04:00

THE COUNTESS LuAnn de Lessepes' single "Money Can't Buy You Class" is simply painful, not that we expected any better. For all that she's got going for her (the show, her figure, that Kathleen Turner/Marlboro Miles voice), LuAnn should stick to her strengths and avoid her liabilities, such as singing. It's hard on the ears and the heart.
Worst of all, from genre, to beat, to haughty affectation, "Money Can't Buy You Class" is a complete knock-off of one of the best disco songs with a teachable message of all time, Eartha Kitt's "Where is My Man?" If you are new to disco with a message, we suggest you skip The Countess and head for The Queen. Eartha.

Must See : Gaga by UO's Male A'cappella Group, On The Rocks

2010-04-26T18:48:00.008-04:00

EVERYONE we know is waiting on pins and hypodermic needles for the all-Gaga episode of "Glee". Since that is still weeks away, here's a little taste of what may be to come: On the Rocks, The University of Oregon's male a'cappella group performs "Bad Romance" complete with choreography and shout-outs to "Poker Face" and "Paparazzi". Think of this as the amuse-bouche to "Glee"'s Gaga entrée.

Worst for Day

2010-04-26T10:36:00.010-04:00

Two days after members of the TTT editorial team SPOTTED The MARC's piercing blue eyes from beneath a baseball cap outside Pastis in the Meatpacking District, comes news that the designer and public relation's man Lorenzo Martone are calling it quits. Page Six reports that sources say Martone has vacated the Chelsea love nest and did not accompany Marc Jacobs to Massachusetts for the P-town wedding of his business partner, Robert Duffy, at which MJ served as best man. Moving out of the Mercantile Building and stepping down as your husband's wedding date? All is not well on Bleecker Street!

UPDATE!

The Boston Herald includes Martone in its story about Robert Duffy's wedding. Also noted were the inclusion of hired stripers at the wedding. Strippers! Trash. Either way, we hope the boys get it together or we'll never see this again.

Best for (To)night :

2010-04-23T08:22:00.004-04:00

Listen-up trannies: GUMBO, the Thursday night gay party in DUMBO (which has been lauded as the gay party by Out, Time Out NY, Next Magazine, and, of course, TTT) has moved 24 hours down the calendar to Fridays. Tonight, shamble on down to Galapagos Art Space (16 Main Street, Brooklyn) for a night of boozing and cruising with the most eligible guys in the key 24-36 gay demo. This isn't Boiler Room so bring your best cocktail conversation and your game face. FYI for regulars: Unlike the Thursday night iteration, the new GUMBO starts at 10 and goes until 4. Two-for-one drinks from 12-1am! RSVP via Facebook.

Must See : the Metropolitan Etiquette Authority

2010-04-23T07:49:00.006-04:00

WPIX reports on a New York artist who is fed up with the general disgustingness of the MTA experience and is doing something about it. Jason Shelowitz makes MTA-lookalike signs reminding the trash on the trains to not use the subway as an opportunity to grope others, clip their toenails or commit 8 other offenses to gentility. Of course signs aren't going to do anything, but the concept is cute enough.

The New Ivy Campus

2010-04-22T09:30:00.013-04:00

I mean, any press is good press- yes? A recent article in the Observer highlights 2 of our favorite things: Williamsburg and The Ivy-League, namely who reigns supreme: Yale vs. Harvard. Whether you find it sad or funny, the article read true. We have included a few key highlights (with TTT comments in red) below:

Mr. Bradley’s classmate, Slate editor Jacob Weisberg, was more specific but no less clear. “I mean, Williamsburg is sort of the Yale campus without the classes, right?” he said. “Brooklyn’s where Yale graduates belong; Washington is more where Harvard graduates belong.(and NYU boys can keep the East Village) Harvard, though it sends many graduates to New York—hello! this reporter among them—does not have the same relationship with New York as Yale—in part for the simple reason that it is much further away.

As Mr. Bradley put it: “The Harvard Club still feels to me like an outpost of another city—like it’s a subsidiary of a company that’s based somewhere else. The Yale Club feels more … I don’t know, Yale and New York always go together. Of course they do.” (Reminder Yalies, its getting nice out make use of the YC rooftop bar. Decent martini’s and on the way home from work)
Yalies in New York feel intense loyalty toward one another. Most of them love hanging out together, and prefer it to hanging out with anyone else.

There is a notion among Yaliens—the nonnative New Yorkers among them, at least—that the city is owned by them. (sad, but true) They covet ownership of it when they arrive, eyeing with frustrated envy the graduates of Columbia and N.Y.U. in their midst who have already been here for four years. (envy is a strong word, most NYU boys cant find their way past Eastern Bloc, oh wait, sorry, forgot about Rockit)

“They’ll [Yalies] throw around names of places in a way Harvard kids don’t,” one Columbia student complained. “They’ll say, ‘I’m at Botanica,’ even if they don’t know if you, someone who goes to school here, know what Botanica is, whereas I think Harvard kids would say, ‘I’m at a bar in Soho. It’s called Botanica.’ (well there is a lot wrong with this. Namely, who goes to “a bar in Soho” no one would ever say that. Period. That is the last place anyone would go for drinks.)

Really, this will always be an ongoing argument—like blackberry vs. iphone. Which ever one you have, you think is better. And then there are the phone stackers (aka have work Blackberry and personal iPhone), Yale undergrad Harvard grad (or visa-versa) yes, there are a few mincing around the city.

Fashion's Night Out 2010

2010-04-22T09:06:00.002-04:00

Ever the innovator, Anna Wintour has big plans for this year's Fashion's Night Out. SmartChicStyle reports that the Vogue-spearheaded event will kick-off with an enormous 200 model, 1,500 seat fashion show on September 7th at Lincoln Center. The purpose of the show is to highlight key trends and inspire shoppers to purchase them. Tickets to the mega-show go on sale this summer.

Best For Day : 4/20

2010-04-20T09:13:00.002-04:00

Today is April 20th, known by college kids as 4-20, the high holy day of St. Mary J. Juana. Some say the use of "420" originated L.A. police code for pot smoking in progress. Others claim 4:20pm was the time high schools in California let out in the '70s and the numeric slang refers to the Left coast's after school activity of choice. Debating the origins of "420" is a little too stoner for our tastes. When it comes to weed, we follow the WWMD? (What Would Mischa Do?) rule, which is, smoke it if you got it. And if you are on a beach, in a nightclub or the driver's seat of a convertible parked outside Fred Segal, well, all the better. 4/20 is best for 4/20.

Best for Brunch

2010-04-19T15:42:00.005-04:00

Kittichai at the Thompson Hotel is certainly not the first place one would think to make a brunch reservation. But after suggested by a long time TTT friend, we decided to check it out. $20 may only get you one drink at the exclusive summertime rooftop club; but for brunch, it will get you an entree and unlimited signature brunch cocktails. Not overly crowded and certainly no sense of a hurried meal, this is a new TTT pick. Great for a gloomy spring afternoon and certainly great for spotting. The menu is eclectic and the attractive wait staff was more than accommodating. A great place to get tipsy before traipsing up to Soho for a little afternoon shopping.

Purge: Fay-Bans

2010-04-14T15:40:00.004-04:00

Alright, faux Ray-Bans they had a fair run. But kiddies, it is time to put this cheap-o trend to rest. It is bad enough that these have over popularized the classic fame, but now you can't throw a rock in McCarren Park without hitting some gipster in the head; not to mention the slew of overweight middle-American teenage tourists that are now sporting this trend. Summer is nearing, it is time to invest in a real pair of shades. Find something that suits your face shape and shows your personality. We know, not everyone wants to drop $500 on TF's but there are plenty of in between options out there. Get it girls, unless you want to be the laughing stock on the FIP ferry.

Must (One Day?) See : I Love You Phillip Morris

2010-04-14T08:34:00.010-04:00

Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor's "gay movie", I Love You Phillip Morris, looks like a solid comedy with a compelling, "based on a true story"-plot, to back it up. Yet the U.S. release date hangs in limbo. Originally slatted for a March release, the date was moved to April and now the end of July. The story of a gay con man who finds true love with his prison cellmate is so far-fetched it could have only happened in real life. The fact that the movie isn't the typically campy gay movie that American mainstream audiences are used to (see: The Birdcage) or a tragedy were gays are marginalized, victims of circumstance (see: The Boys in the Band, Philadelphia, Brokeback Mountain . .) may have something to do with it. The reviews from abroad, where ILYPM has already been released, are positive as is this one from the 2009 Sundance Film Festival where it was screened :

Written by the team responsible for the similarly dark Bad Santa and based on a true story, I Love You Phillip Morris is an extraordinary film that serves as a reminder of just how good Carrey can be when he's not tied into a generic Hollywood crowd-pleaser. His comic timing remains as exquisite as ever, but this is not a loveable rubber-faced rogue. One could argue that, like The Truman Show, this is another film about a lost naif, but when it plays its final hand, I Love You Phillip Morris is really much, much stranger.

Breakthrough, a showcase for Jim Carrey's sometimes untapped talent, with a strange twist ending: why has it taken so long for I Love You Phillip Morris to make it to American megaplexes? Sigh.

Must Hear : Collin Farrell

2010-04-13T08:38:00.005-04:00

We remember Collin Farrell because he used to be super hot, then he epitomized trash, then got kind of hot again. Looks aside, we should always remember Collin Farrell for being an out-spoken defender of gay rights. In a recent statement issued in connection with his support of Irish LGBT group Belong To, Farrell remembered the childhood torment of his gay brother Eamon and urged an institutional shift in teaching tolerance, "Intolerance is not genetically encoded—it is taught. It is learned at home. It is learned in the classrooms and it is learned anywhere else we gather as a group," he continues. "Bullying is torture, it is another betrayal of basic human decency and its scars reach into the future of its survivors." Farrell's full statement can be found at the Belong To website.

Don't Call Me Gaga

2010-04-09T11:03:00.007-04:00

An extended trailer for the Sex and the City Movie sequel dropped this week. Everyone's freaking over the clothes and locales. We're just stuck on how "Lady Gaga" Samantha Jones' styling is. I mean . . .

RaGa to say the least! This movie is going to be traaaaaannnnnnyyy, but awesome in its ridiculousness. Liza is in it! What more can you ask for?

Shoes 7

2010-04-08T09:18:00.007-04:00

"You can always tell a tranny by her shoes." In "Shoes", TTT gives a stage to the foundation of any fabulous outfit: the boots, loafers, clogs and heels that we all put on each day.
Right now, flowerbeds are bursting with colorful blooms. What better way to match nature's exuberance for spring than with harlequin patterned shoes?

Tranny Vocab 16 : Trash

2010-04-07T09:20:00.012-04:00

Attention, kiddies - it's time to put on your thinking caps because Tranny Vocab is about to resume. In this series, The Tranny Times explores the varied and wonderful lexicon of Williamsburg trannies. Today's lesson is Trash

Trash [trash] noun. One who lacks social grace, common manners and/or decency, or acts in an overall manner unacceptable beyond the DMV or KFC. Think guests on Jerry Springer or Jenny Jones or anyone who has ever willingly relocated to Nevada. We all know (or might be) one of those people who strolls up to low-key dinner parties, wasted, or stumbles into work late wearing the outfit from the previous day, or gives/receives oral sex in public bathrooms.
While everyone engages in behavior that may fall under the 'trash' umbrella sometimes, in order to be characterized as true trash, one must be a repeat offender and fulfill a certain level of criteria.
Here are some questions you might want to ask yourself when trying to determine if you're indeed trash:

Do I own any Armani Exchange graphic t-shirts?
Do I drink Mountain Dew?
Do I spend my summers at the Jersey Shore?
Does my skin look like leather?
Do I have airbrushed tips?
Do I have, or have ever had, blond highlights?
Is my mobile phone be-dazzled?

While some of these attributes may seem absurd, there are others that may hit a little closer to home. Other situations that may deem you trash: You get wasted and then scan the bar and/or cocktail tables for unattended drinks to quench your thirst. You secretly bring your own booze to establishments that serve alcohol. You can't remember where you are or how you got somewhere when you wake up in the morning -- and you aren't surprised or worried. You find yourself standing on the toilets in Sugarland while your friend feeds you a bump with his apartment key.

Signature quotes of trash: "Oh, I never wear underwear on first dates. I just can't be bothered with looking all over the floor for my underwear the next morning," or "Yes I posted a pump and dump on craigslist last night -- girl's gotta get laid," or "Hell yeah -- I hit that shit and got myself OUT THE DOE'" (in reference to a crack pipe in Bedstuy).

At parties or big events, it's always easy to pick out the trash. He will be the one hoarding free drinks and hors d'oeuvre, and attempting to get into the VIP section even though he is only there because he came with a friend of a friend. Also don't be surprised if this person is seen out on the patio trying to bum cigarettes or flirting with someone's boyfriend (right in front of them). And that's when you know it's time to grab a Hefty bag -- and take out the trash.

See also: White trash, Trailer trash, Southern trash.

Must See : Harvard Sailing Team and "Sassy Gay Friend"

2010-04-06T09:24:00.004-04:00

Don't get it twisted The Harvard Sailing Team is not THE HARVARD Sailing team, but an extremely funny NYC-based comedy troop. Below, the male cast plays up just about every female stereotype in "Boys Will Be Girls". ("Umm, I had the Jamie Lee Curtis yogurt.", "I actually digested a huge gust of wind on my way to work.", "I uh, shared a bagel with garbage." -- I mean . . . ) Click here to see "Girls Will Be Boys", and what's going on on the other side of the phone. In this sketch, the girls just come off as lesbians but to each her own.

You've probably already seen "Sassy Gay Friend", but if you haven't, here it is. Consider this a TTT public service to you.

Best for Easter

2010-04-05T09:28:00.014-04:00

Easter Sunday, three friends, Victor Jefferys II, Jefferson Scott Lincoln and Clinton Swett threw a "celebration of the resurrection" in McCarren Park. The gathering of "ex-patriots, wanderers, adventurers, fortune seekers and Holly Go-Lightlies" called for "church-chic attire" which guests executed as a blend of super-prep and '20s/'30s sportswear. The table held an ample spread of delicious picnic staples including pitchers of white sangria. Nearby, friends played croquet and corn hole while Jefferys snapped portraits of guests lounging on a white bed.

Tranny Droppings : Karl Largerfeld

2010-04-01T13:13:00.006-04:00

Karl Lagerfeld's 14-piece Goyard luggage set being loaded into a van on the Lower East Side after the Chanel commando's tranny trek to New York City. This is how you make an exit.

Best for Day : Blond Tips

2010-04-01T09:14:00.009-04:00

Every tranny thinks she's freakin' Emily Post. From "the Countess" LuAnn to New York Magazine everyone has an opinion on correct etiquette. With all this "expertise" floating around, how come most New Yorkers act like junkyard dogs when it comes to common courtesy? The need for clear-cut, useful rules of decorum is why we LOVE the simple, direct, indisputable advice given by PR maven Susan Blond in her video series, "Blond Tips". The video above handles one of New Yorkers' most uncomfortable moments, the awkward moment the restaurant bill arrives. (Younger men, pay special attention to "when the other party offers to pay". If you aren't going to split, at least REACH for your wallet. It's a simple gesture that prevents your date from feeling like a john.) Love a good tip! "Blond Tips" are best for day.

Best for Shabbat

2010-03-26T12:40:00.003-04:00

I mean... with Pesach around the corner and TTT's close proximity to the Hassid hood (not to mention our obsession with Gaga and the Jews) this definitely goes down as one of the all time BFD. A big round of applause to our own Jewish princess Stephanie Benatar for sending this in!

Must See : REMINDER Boys' Night at L'Etoile Tonight

2010-03-26T11:29:00.003-04:00

Listen Trannies, THE place to be tonight is Lincoln Center for Boys' Night at L'etoile. The 3-act opera of true love, decadent luxury and family drama is followed by an open bar after party. Pull out your tux and get your hair did, it's gonna be a Ra-Ga night!

Best for Day : Most Watched Ever

2010-03-25T08:20:00.002-04:00

Lady Gaga is the most-watched video artist of all time. According to online analytics company Visible Measures, Gaga is the first video artist to achieve one billion online video views. As impressive as that is, the number may be far larger: Visible Measures is only tallying the views of "Poker Face" (374,606,128 views), "Bad Romance" (360,020,327) and "Just Dance" (272,941,674). If the count were to include "Paparazzi" and "Telephone", Gaga could easily surpass the 1.5 billion views mark. Love a good record holder, love a good Gaga. Winning is best for day.

Best for Day 38

2010-03-24T16:16:00.005-04:00

Jude Law and Dior- what more could you need to spice you your hump day?

Spotted @ Sugarbabies' Spring Boy Drive

2010-03-24T11:04:00.026-04:00

As anticipated, The Tranny Times' Sugarbabies Happy Hour at The Townhouse was a runaway hit. Over 50 guys took part in the "Spring Boy Drive" which introduced a stable of new guys to regulars of the after-work mixer. SPOTTED at the Townhouse . . . PR boys, Darren Back, Michael Grela, Tim Rathschmidt . . . representing the garment district, Kari Green, Jack Eustace, Tom Carberry, Ryan Lerner, Matt Smith, Doug Reker . . . the usual architects, Ben Salling, Eric Hastings, Bryan Hale . . . the Matthew Williamson sequin-studded porn-producer Jincey Lumpkin consulting with Nathan Kipe . . . the boys from Colgate/Palmolive lead by Jorge Fontanez . . . the girls : Elizabeth Harrell, Gabsy Goldman, Clare Hewdat, Dorian Mergler, Stephanie Benatar, Lauren Conklin . . . the ever-radiant Matthew Maddox . . .

Shoes 6

2010-03-24T10:46:00.009-04:00

"You can always tell a tranny by her shoes." In "Shoes", TTT gives a stage to the foundation of any fabulous outfit: the boots, loafers, clogs and heels that we all put on each day.
Who says patent pumps are only for the opera? Consider black patent when cocktailing poolside: they are water and vodka proof!

Best for Tuesday: Sugarbabies @ The Townhouse Tonight!

2010-03-23T11:02:00.004-04:00

Come for a quick drink after work, or stay a little later for some boozy cabaret. Sugarbabies is always a treat! Sugarbabies Spring Boy Drive is a great way to meet a few new faces, catchup with a some old ones and salute the warm months ahead, looking forward to seeing all of you tonight.

Best for Evening: Nita Nita

2010-03-22T18:16:00.004-04:00

Recession or not, we all appreciate a good drink special. Nita Nita is a great local spot for those Burg kiddies on the north side. Rehash the weekend on a Monday or Tuesday with friends on half price bottles of wine all night (yes, the whole wine list). Mondays also offer great margarita specials and nice little bites to munch on. Its cozy for a gloomy spring evening and will be great for breezy summer nights, lounging on the Adirondack chairs in the back garden. Put this one in your mobile devices kiddies -- the wait staff is low key and friendly. One word of warning, like everywhere else in our fair neighborhood, CASH ONLY.

Must Hear - "Here Lies Love"

2010-03-22T09:12:00.012-04:00

For 50 years, Imelda Marcos cast a long shadow over global politics, tabloid society and trannydom at large. The über-fashionable Philippine first-lady-turn-politico is best known for her dual perchants for glamor and excess. The most widely reported antidote of her extravagance being her 3000 pair shoe collection left behind when she and President Ferdinand Marcos were forced to flee Malacañang Palace during the 1985 coup. We can only assume that someone so glitz-obsessed as Imelda is beyond flattered by a new 3-disc album, "Here Lies Love", which chronicles the life of the sequined lady. Orchestrated by the great David Byrnes, a list of the mega-album's collaborators reads as a who's-who of musical mavericks of the past 30 years: Natalie Merchant, Cyndi Lauper, Norman Cook ("Fatboy Slim"), Martha Wainwright, Tori Amos, Steve Earle, Roisin Murphy and Santigold. The album's lyrics borrow largely from Imelda Marco's own words, which helps to achieve Byrne's goal; to not describe the life of Marcos but to get into the head of the woman who lived it. The tremendous artistry behind this biographical work weaves a story that is beautiful without mockery. (There is no mention of the shoe collection.) We dare you not to play this at every dinner/cocktail/rooftop party this spring. It is that good.

Tranny Daytrip: Stone Barns

2010-03-17T20:16:00.006-04:00

With a tickle of spring in the air, we are itching to break the weekend routine: afternoon movies and lengthy indoor boozy-brunches. Though, without a car, day-tripping is not always easy. Stone Barns, a short Metro-North ride away, is a perfect Sunday afternoon excursion. Stone Barns offers a variety of activities including a winter farm market, touring the gardens and grounds and the gourmand's Blue Hill Cafe. Go up with friends or take your new spring beau- a great inexpensive lit-eral breath of fresh air. For those who don't want to drop the price of a new pair of TF's on dinner at Blue Hill, take advantage of the winter root vegetables and meats and prepare a Sunday feast back in the Burg.

http://www.stonebarnscenter.org/

Binge 4 : Downtime

2010-03-14T21:42:00.006-04:00

Spring/summer 2010 begins this Sunday and calendars are filling up fast. In the frenzy to take advantage of all the great things that happen when the weather warms up, it's essential to stop and make time for downtime. Not everyone needs the same amount, but it's important that each of us takes a look at his calendar and evaluates: "Is it worth going to party X on Tuesday if I am going to look and feel like shit at Party Y on Wednesday?" Don't feel like a party-pooper for sitting one out, see what happens to even the mighty Gaga when she doesn't make time for herself:

Flashback Friday 1

2010-03-12T15:19:00.005-05:00

Flaskback Fridays is a weekly window into the past. Pre-blogs, Pre-Gaga, (mostly) Pre-9/11: Flashback Fridays focuses on what was relevant before you got your first fake ID.

The first Flashback Friday is a two-parter documenting Michael Alig's 1989 Outlaw Party at McDonald's in Times Square. It was a 200-person invasion and all the big club kids were there : "Party Monster", Alig, himself; James St. James; Keoki plus still-relevant media folks: Michael Musto and Patrick McMullin, and a bunch of, high-off-their-asses, happy-as-shit partiers. All this at a McDonalds! Makes you feel like an ass for going to Boiler Room, doesn't it?

Must See : Lady Gaga's "Telephone" featuring Beyonce

2010-03-12T08:49:00.001-05:00

In case you missed the premier of Lady Gaga's "Telephone" featuring Beyonce. Better work some outfits!

Hold the Phone

2010-03-11T16:12:00.008-05:00

Tonight kiddies! If you aren't at the Whipped Thursday night Soriee or your favorite charity's annual event, tune in to E! at 11:30 and catch the world premiere of Gaga's newest work or art (in collaboration with Beyonce). If not tonight, at least you'll have something to look forward to in the office on Friday morning. Ra-gas unite!

Must See : Two Husbands

2010-03-11T10:51:00.003-05:00

Everyone should be as excited about meeting "two husbands" as Calen. Yeeeeauhhhh, they're much alike. If this little guy can understand love in under 60 seconds, what is wrong with the rest of America? Pass it on.

Shoes 5

2010-03-10T08:59:00.004-05:00

"You can always tell a tranny by her shoes." In "Shoes", TTT gives a stage to the foundation of any fabulous outfit: the boots, loafers, clogs and heels that we all put on each day.

The sports shoe for spring comes to us from Puma. Created by Turkish-born British fashion designer Hussein Chalayan, the hightop in the dreamy color Puma calls "Vaporous Gray" is constructed of inverted leather with rubber soles. Perfect for balmy ferry rides, traipsing down cobbled streets or tossed into the corner of a beach house bedroom during an afternoon romp.

Tranny Vocab 15 : The Younger Man

2010-03-10T08:02:00.014-05:00

Attention, kiddies - it's time to put on your thinking caps because Tranny Vocab is about to resume. In this series, The Tranny Times explores the varied and wonderful lexicon of Williamsburg trannies. Today's lesson is The Younger Man.

The Younger Man [th ee yuhng-ger mhan] noun. The male who is markedly younger than his mate: from seven years to infinity. In this sort of relationship, The Younger Man simultaneously holds all the cards and none at all. The Younger Man is youthful, enthusiastic and open-minded to his lover who is (often) more successful, mature, connected and interesting.

Pros of being The Younger Man:

Top-notch dinners that come to a close with someone else picking up the check.
Invitations to parties without a keg or BYOB policy.
Easy entré into otherwise closed circles of influential individuals.
In-depth conversations on the meaning of life at a well-appointed vacation home.
Sex with a pro who's spent decades working on his body.

Cons of being The Younger Man:

Being patronized by mate's friends with less appreciation for, or intense jealousy of, youth.
Adding to or shaving off a few years for everyone's parents' sake.
Being mistaken for the cater-waiter, or worse, the son.
Often coming in second. (see The Careerist)
The persistent dread that one day soon his ass is going to drop like a fallen soufflé.

Leading Younger Men:

(l to r: Lorenzo Martone, Jesus Luz, Jonathan Adler, Tom Ford, Brooks Perlin)

The Verdict on The Younger Man:
Helen Gurley Brown, '60s icon, author of ground breaking Sex and the Single Girl, former editor of Cosmopolitan and a Younger Woman herself once said, "Always marry someone older because no matter how old you get, you'll always be the babe." Wise words from a woman who's always had her priorities in order.

Best for Day 37

2010-03-09T15:54:00.005-05:00

Karl is one of the few reigning trannies with the budget and the creativity to keep pushing his shows to the limit. Consistent with the "snowy" theme we love him for, the King of Fashion showed his Chanel FW '10 collection amidst icebergs with the models trekking though a freezing pool of shallow water in faux fur trimmed everything. Karl was apparently inspired by the Ice Hotel in Sweden, although, for the record, he has never been there.

Karl, for the record IS BFD.

Worst for Day

2010-03-08T21:30:00.007-05:00

The "shocking" story of the elected official who built a career supporting legislature that denies rights to gays and lesbians being forced out of the closet after a scandal is so familiar it's cliché. Yesterday, California state Sen. Roy Ashburn (R) told conservative talk show host Inga Barks, "I am gay." in a radio interview. Last week, Ashburn was pulled over by police leaving Faces, a gay nightclub in Sacramento, with another man in the passenger seat. He also told Barks that he will not seek public office after his term ends this year and asked people to pray for him.
Uh no. Pray for the poor guy caught in your Chevy Tahoe that night! His friends will never let him live that down. Pray for the gay and lesbian couples and families robbed of their rights for fourteen years. Pray for the individuals who live more honestly than you, people whose lives you, as a public servant, made more difficult. For projecting your self-hatred onto others you receive no prayers, or sympathy. But if we are passing Faces in Sacramento California at happy hour and see your Tahoe parked out front, we'll come in to let you by us margaritas. Asshole.

Best for Day 36

2010-03-08T20:57:00.004-05:00

The sexiest tidbit to come out of the Vanity Fair Oscar party is that Anderson Cooper brought his boyfriend, Ben Maisani. The only photo of the two at the party is the one above showing Anderson and Ben's backs as they chat with the Seinfelds. Sources say A.C. and his b.f. sat at a table with Mary Richardson Kennedy, Aaron Sorkin, Katherine Ross, Ron Howard, Tabitha Soren and Michael Lewis. Could this, in addition to Cooper's firehouse-turn-love nest purchase, be a soft opening for the big, "Yep. I'm gay!"? This toe out of the glass closet is best for day.

Best for Day 35

2010-03-04T14:04:00.002-05:00

Love a mini-Gaga! Best for day!

Boys Night at L'Etoile

2010-03-03T11:24:00.004-05:00

Now that the NYCB season has come to a close, the Koch (State) Theater revs up for the NYC Opera spring season. Chabrier's L'étoile (opera buffe) will smartly open the '10 season with a party for the boys!

UWS opera queens meets WV GPCs for a fabulous evening of drinks, hors d'oeuvres, stunning visuals and late 19th century musical flare.

Juilliard-trained opera singer and drag performer Shequida will serve as Mistress of Ceremonies, a guaranteed good time as she shows off her five-octave range with opera selections and pop hits.

Tickets are going fast kiddies! Look forward to seeing you in the first tier boxes.

Must See : High Society

2010-03-02T15:44:00.002-05:00

We're not sure if this is a "must-see" as much as a "you're bound to see this", but "High Society" starring Tinsley Mortimer (gag) and John Paul Calderon (puke) premiers March 10th on the CW. JP throwing hissy fits and drinks alongside Tinsley trying to revive her image by aping old money affectations is going to be a real treat. Given the fact that the "High Society" cast is a solid decade older than the "NYC Prep" kids, this is going to look like "Jersey Shore" meets "Rich Girls". God, "Rich Girls", now THAT was an NYC show!

Best for Day: Bakeri

2010-03-02T09:47:00.004-05:00

The pretty little coffee shop on Wythe between N7th and 8th called Bakeri is a mini vacay for the soul. The Rachel Ashwell tweeness of the space will transport you from Kings county, NY to a quiet, European cafe in say Paris or the Netherlands. The coffee and pastries, delicious indulgences, are a great excuse to linger while the thoughtful breakfast and lunch menu make it a destination. Fabulous first or second casual date spot, not recommended for break-ups!, Bakeri is best for day!

Best for Day : Spring/Summer Shopping

2010-03-01T09:50:00.003-05:00

The only way to get through this last, chilly month of winter is spring/summer shopping. A true tranny is always forward thinking and first to market to see the S/S10 merchandise that stores are rolling out now. Jeffrey New York is the premier retailer of the new Lacoste Red line. The new segment features an askew crocodile logo and slimmer fit for lithe, beach-bound boys. Be sure to check it before the other queens wreck it. Jeffrey is also high on Gaga-fever. Popping in to see the Monster Ball-themed displays is best for day.

Must Hear, Must Have

2010-02-25T23:50:00.010-05:00

New Brit "it" girl V.V. Brown is making a name for herself state-side. With her recent show at Brooklyn Bowl, Ms. Brown knocked the bowling socks off of attendees with her crowd-pleasers, 'Shark in the Water' and 'Crying Blood.'
Mark this tranny's words, this is one to watch. Reminiscent of a playful Amy Winehouse, mixed with modern doo-wop, Ms. Brown is ruffling feathers. It's just pure, whimsical fun. The perfect tunes to put you in the mood for Spring.
Want context? V.V. co-wrote the Pussycat Dolls' 'PCD'. She also wrote a few songs for the Sugababes, the U.K.'s latest girl-band craze. Not bad for a 26-year old, huh?
Check out Ms. Brown in an acoustic piece filmed for Paper magazine.

Best for Day 33

2010-02-25T14:46:00.005-05:00

A still from the much anticipated Telephone video (due to launch next week) - Ga brings everything mid-century modern gay together. Judging from the stills, it appears to be very A Single Man meets Edward Scissorhands and it looks fabulous. Stayed tuned for full footage kiddies. RA-Gas unite!

Worst for Day

2010-02-25T11:49:00.004-05:00

Getting straight guys into bed is a talent not all gays posses. Some have it, Anthony Stancl did not, which is why he resorted to posing as a girl on Facebook and collecting nude photos of 30 of his male high school classmates then using those to blackmail the guys into sex with him. On Wednesday, Stancl was sentenced to 15 years for his sloppy seduction. But is this punishment? The 19 year-old will surely find plenty of horny "straight guys" waiting for him in prison.

Spotted @ 2 Downtown Parties

2010-02-24T10:31:00.019-05:00

The editors and directors of Paper Magazine hosted a small party last night at Macoa, ostensibly introducing the snug restaurant/nightclub on Church St. to the magazine's friends. Svedka provided signature cocktails to a mixed crowd ranging from dads in suits to mohawks from the LES. SPOTTED at Macao . . . Paper mag's editorial director and front row regular at every Fashion Week show, Mickey Boardman, holding court . . . Michelle Lindsay, also of Paper, meeting, greeting and showering guests with compliments. . . Efrain Oliva making introductions as usual.

Switching gears (and crowds), A Private Club and Lalique hosted a kick-off party for "Decodence: Legendary Interiors and Illustrious Travelers Aboard the SS Normandie" at the South Street Seaport Museum. The exhibit celebrates the elaborate deco interiors of the fabulous SS Normandie. The opening celebration was a preppy party à la "Gossip Girl" featuring the usual cast of characters: post-grads in blue blazers and slicked-back hair alongside Chanel 2.55-swinging girls enjoying a little too much white wine for a Tuesday night. The wait staff, provided by the charming Marc Levine, were most attractive, as usual. Gift bags included the limited edition SS Normandie tee shirts designed by Jeremy Scott. (Perfect for P-town!) The biggest sighting in the usual crowd of party queers (*cough* Kristian Laliberte *cough*) was Seth Weissman, the boy who allegedly bought half of Fire Island Pines!

Binge 4: The Waterbobble

2010-02-23T12:20:00.004-05:00

While not all of us spend countless hours in the gym, TTT does understand the perks: lurking in the steam room at a mid-town Equinox, spotting your squats partner or bulking up for your summer share - to name a few. This is the time of year we all get a little more body conscious, especially with spring holidays in the tropics around the corner and FIP weekends commencing soon thereafter. Whether the means to your method is vinyasa at Greenhouse or a brisk jog around the McCarren track, start out your spring regiment in style - Waterbobble is an inexpensive way to quench your thirst and show a little green flair while mincing to the locker room. Just think of how much cash you’ll save by nixing the Evian for a fashion forward pocket Brita, at $10 a pop, you'll be able to afford to stock up on your UnderArmor.

Best for Monday

2010-02-22T14:13:00.004-05:00

I mean... what more could you want from a Dolce & Gabbana ad? Glitterazzi, man-on-man action, subtle butt glancing, bow-ties and hot Italian men. All that is missing from this BFD is Madonna eating pasta with her bare hands in the back corner.

Spotted @ Sugarland

2010-02-22T11:14:00.007-05:00

Only if you were at Sugarland on Saturday can you understand how ridiculously packed it was. Everyone and his gay brother was there to celebrate the official end of New York Fashion Week, including fashion's Gaysian mafia. SPOTTED at Sugarland . . . kicking off the sophomore year of his celebrated design career, Prabal Gurung . . . the man behind the must-have tees for S/S10, Alexander Wang . . . international sensation and sweet-as-pie style blogger who might as well just move to the Bedford stop, Bryan Boy . . .

Best for Evening : A Birthday Party to Support Haiti Relief

2010-02-19T10:30:00.004-05:00

A birthday party and a Haiti benefit in one. What could be more best for Friday evening? The crowd will be cute, there's an open vodka bar 9:00-10:30 and 100% of proceeds go to helping those affected by the earthquake. Sounds like a sure bet!

Spotted @ 3RDWard 2009 Winter Group Show

2010-02-19T09:58:00.007-05:00

Last Friday, Williamsburg's artarazzi hiked to the Morgan stop for 3RDWard's 2009 Winter Group Show. The show included the work of 25 artists, narrowed down from hundreds of submissions worldwide. The event drew a pretty, pretty crowd. SPOTTED at 3RDWard . . . HBO's Jenita Ulloa supporting her friend and colleague Nikolay Lyutskanov . . . modern master Emily St. John (above with her portrait of musician boyfriend Jermiah Furr) . . . the Atlanta brigade Will Sansom, Kari Green, Lauren Baker, Skye Whitley, Anna Burns . . . yoginis fresh from a retreat in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, Julie Tomaino, Tiziana Angello, Leigh Evans . . . DJ Spreadin' It creating the soundtrack

Tranny Vocab Lesson 14 : The Careerist

2010-02-19T09:08:00.012-05:00

The Careerist [th ee kuh-reer-ist] noun. The pursuit of professional advancement is his top priority; this gay is all business, even when at play.

What to look out for: The Careerist is the Venus Flytrap of gay men. His underwear model looks will distract you, his well-rehearsed cocktail party banter will maintain your interest and his tony co-op with its closet full of impeccably cut suits and pictures of friends at his house on Water Island will have you thinking husband. Not so fast, girl. The Careerist prefers his men like his salad dressing: on the side. The Careerist is the perennial bachelor that everyone would like to catch, the missing half of everyone's GPC. The Careerist would make a fantastic mate if he wasn't already married . . . to his job. Don't get it twisted, sister, you'll always be the other woman.

Best for Evening : GUMBO @ Galapagos

2010-02-18T10:31:00.005-05:00

The monthly GUMBO party at Galapagos in downtown Brooklyn is THE party for good times with cute boys. This month's party takes on a cinematic theme with the Independent Film Project in the role of co-host. Have a GUMBO-jito, get a haircut, be photographed, make an Instant Flipbook, meet a boy, get married and move to Connecticut, all in one night! Ok, maybe not the last part but you never know. GUMBO is best for evening. See you there!

Best for Fashion Week

2010-02-18T10:19:00.005-05:00

A perfect closing photo to New York's Fashion week. Our fave style blogger Bryanboy and Zoe's right hand top-fop, Brad Goreski, seated together at Philip Lim.

Thom Browne Fall '10

2010-02-17T09:31:00.013-05:00

Thom has "ivy" boy down to a tee -- and does so at any ivy price point. But what other American designer to we look to for forward thinking sportswear that is appropo for Friday's at the office that is also whispered about on the ferry to the pines? The S/S '10 collection boasts a plethora of standards; red and blue stripes, undercut trousers and trim cut shorts - all with a hint of irony and pizzaz. Anyone shelling out 5K for their share can certainly shell another 4K for the fab new tweed suit that he has restructured. Pair it with you alma mater vintage sweater and you are good to go- whether it be mincing down 8th ave or through the meat rack. Girls best be thinking ahead... Our summer homes are not so far off.

full collection

Gawker.com : Further Down the Spiral

2010-02-16T15:22:00.008-05:00

The quality of writing at Gawker has been on the decline for a solid four years. With editors picked off one-by-one to head-up "legit" media outlets' online platforms (Time.com, RadarOnline.com) the talent pool at the New York media centric blog is as scummy as your Fire Island house's hot tub after Ascension weekend. The draw of the blog has devolved from breaking "insider" news to snark for snarkiness' sake and finally to stale rumors and reposts from partner blogs. The 2007 debut and explosive popularity of Jezebel was an alarm that something is broken at Gawker Media. Simply put, how did the franchise "girls' blog" so quickly outshine the flagship site?

When Brian Moylan joined Gawker a few months, his gay humor posts initially seemed like a bright spot on the blog: funny, New York-y subject matter the likes of which Gawker readers hadn't seen since "Phonecalls from the Past" and "Altercations". As with all things "Gawker", nothing good lasts. It's totes unforch that Moylan's pieces get worse with every gay listicle he bangs out. (Remember when Gawker railed against the proliferation of listicles online and in print?!). His newest, "A Handy Guide to All Gay Men", trips its way through tired clichés, out-of-touch omissions and one major error. It's as if someone in Kansas (or Guam) wrote the post based on what their gay cousin once told him about life in New York.

For starters, this list in not New York specific, as his post implies. Two-thirds of the TTT editorial board hail from opposite ends of the nation and we all knew what each of these "types of gay" were before owning our first foreign-made automobiles. The piece glosses over the major subgroups of gay culture specific to New York. Where are the Ivy-gays, the Otters, the WAMRs, the society walkers and industry big-wig closet cases? Where are the NY-relevant gays? As for hangouts, this list may as well have been written in 1999. Who is packing it in at The Phoenix, Eastern Bloc, The Boiler Room, Metropolitan, The Boom Boom Room, Club 57 and Sugarland every night? Finally, what the hell is a drag queen doing on a list of types of gay men? A unicorn is a unicorn not a horse with a horn; a drag queen is a drag queen not a gay guy with duct tape on his johnson. By Moylan's definition of "type of gay man", he should add "TV weatherman" to the list. (Think about it.)

One thing about Gawker, it is consistent. It consistently sucks more each year.

Best for Day 34

2010-02-16T10:47:00.004-05:00

Aesthetically speaking, there is no better time of year in New York than Fashion Week. Even from the periphery it's a feast for the eyes: the boys are dressed up, the girls bring out the big guns, BryanBoy is in town, and the parties never cease. With just three more days or shows and events, we're calling NY Fashion Week best for day . . .

Must Have : Chatroulette.com

2010-02-11T23:19:00.023-05:00

It's been banging around the Internet for about 2 weeks now but Chatroulette is just now blowing up as the new big meme. It's simple: log on to www.chatroulette.com, enable your webcam and you're randomly connected to someone else anywhere in the world. Users are about 80% male so expect a lot of college boys, European dudes, and cock-shots! Who doesn't love a random web wank, especially by a college boy or European dude? Seriously, Chatroulette: must have . . . or at least try.

Worst for Day

2010-02-11T12:48:00.002-05:00

Fop Checklist:

2010-02-09T11:18:00.010-05:00

A little Tuesday afternoon reading for those who are not busy pushing papers, or rather, need a break from doing so. While most points on this list remain relevant, TTT has taken the liberty of highlighting a few forgotten rules of the modern fop.

“For those not born with a natural dandy effect, this dissection of the dandy temperament will serve as a guide to the proper pose. Individual dandies throughout the ages have emphasized certain qualities over others, but all qualities must be present in some degree for the effect to reach full fruition.”

Here are the qualities that comprise the anatomy of the dandy, ranked in order of importance (TTT editorial remarks in red):

1. Physical distinction

Dandyism can only be painted on a suitable canvas. It is impossible to cut a dandy figure without being tall, slender and handsome, or having at least one of those characteristics to a high degree while remaining at least average in the other two.

“To appear well dressed, be skinny and tall.” — Mason Cooley

2. Elegance

Elegance, of course, as defined by the standards of a dandy’s particular era.

“The dandy's independence, assurance, originality, self-control and refinement should all be visible in the cut of his clothes.” — Ellen Moers

Dandies must love contemporary costume, says Beerbohm, and their dress should be “free from folly or affectation.” – love a good costume!

3. Self-mastery

Barbey speaks of the dandy’s staunch determination to remain unmoved, while Baudelaire says that should a dandy suffer pain, he will “keep smiling.” –say it with a smile gurl.

“Immense calm with your heart pounding.” — Noel Coward

4. Aplomb

While self-mastery is the internal practice of keeping emotions in check, aplomb is how it is expressed to the dandy’s audience.

“Dandyism introduces antique calm among our modern agitations.” — Barbey d’Aurevilly

5. Independence

Ideally financial independence, but if the dandy is forced to work, a spirit of independence will be expressed through his work. – “forced” to work, that's why we spend our happy hours at the Townhouse.

Independence — often to the point of aloofness — will also characterize the dandy’s dealings with the world.

“The epitome of selfish irresponsibility, he was ideally free of all human commitments that conflict with taste: passions, moralities, ambitions, politics or occupations.” — Moers - this.is.fabulous.

6. Wit

Especially a paradoxical way of talking lightly of the serious and seriously of the light that carries philosophical implications.

7. A skeptical, world-weary, sophisticated, bored or blasé demeanor

“The dandy is blasé, or feigns to be.” — Baudelaire

“A spirit of gay misanthropy, a cynical, depreciating view of society.” — Lister – aaaaaaawhat… sound like someone you know?...

“Other people are quite dreadful. The only possible society is oneself.” — Wilde

8. Dignity/Reserve

“the darker and stormier emotions should be kept to ones self” — Bulwer-Lytton

“A flawless dandy, he would be annoyed if he were considered romantic.” — Oscar Wilde, “An Ideal Husband”

9. Discriminating taste

10. A renaissance man

“A complete gentleman, who, according to Sir Fopling, ought to dress well, dance well, fence well, have a genius for love letters, and an agreeable voice for a chamber.” — Etherege, quoted by Bulwer-Lytton in “Pelham”

and finally:

For in the end there is not a code of dandyism, as Barbey writes. “If there were, anybody could be a dandy.”

for more info check out anatomyofadandy

Spotted @ Metropolitan, Bryanboy : Le Superstar Fabuleux

2010-02-09T09:41:00.005-05:00

He's lauded in L.A., mobbed in Manhattan, front row in Paris and adored the world over via his blog: he's BryanBoy and last night he was SPOTTED in Williamsburg having dollar PBRs at Metropolitan. The petite blogger began chronicling his style and lifestyle along with the international collections from his home in Manila, Philippines five years ago. Flash forward a few seasons and Bryanboy has a Marc Jacobs bag named after him and held the place of honor at last season's Dolce & Gabbana show in Milan, sitting front row along side IHT/NY Times' Suzy Menkes, Vogue's Sally Singer, Hamish Bowles and Anna (f-ing) Wintour. According to BB, Williamsburg is super cute and he loves Metro's cheap drinks!

Worst For Day

2010-02-08T16:19:00.004-05:00

Nothing says trash louder than Louis Vuitton's newest family edition. The "trash bags" are part of the S/S '10 collection and a blaring mistake, especially at $2,000 a pop. We hope Rachel is not "dying" over these, at least not in a good way. Back to the drawing board Marc.

Must Read : If You Have to Cry Go Outside

2010-02-05T11:59:00.000-05:00

Like every news outlet with taste, TTT is obsessed with Bravo's "Kell on Earth". Kelly Cutrone is no doubt a bitch, but never for "bitchiness"'s sake. The New York fashion mover and shaker runs a tight ship with no room for empty-headed, over-eager blondes. In true bitch form, she seemingly ignores the fact that it was two blondes, Lauren Conrad and Whitney Port, who made her part of the national conversation. (Or was it Cutrone who made them?) It's with this love of Cutrone's no nonsense operating style that we are at the ready to read If You Have to Cry, Go Outside, Cutone's guide to life aimed at "young women at gay boys". Sound the alarm to book clubs in all 5 boroughs and await the barrage of Cutrone's bon mots ringing out in gay bars from Hells Kitchen to dinner parties in Park Slope.

Missed Connections 14

2010-02-05T11:14:00.006-05:00

There is no "try" in smiling.
The scene: You and a pal on the L train, maybe saw me seeing you in the reflection of the train window. You had amazing black and creme houndstooth gloves, and great ears. When I left the train, you and your pal watched me leave... I tried to smile. I Thought you were cute. What was I wearing or what stop did I get off the train?
Maybe he'll "try" to respond : pers-jqep7-1586584387@craigslist.org

Control Queen seeks nearsighted Romeo
Sooooo, it was around 5:30 or so. I noticed you when I you got on, I was already sitting. But alas, I'd been working nonstop for days, and was a zombie with my coffee and phone solitaire being the only things keeping me awake on my ride home. You brought me out of my stupor when you asked me where I got my glasses. If you would like my assistance when picking out your new frames, I would love nothing more than to do that.
Sooooo, respond to this add and if he's not swamped he'll call ya back : pers-jtzfe-1578800504@craigslist.org

This has to do with 'Lost' right?
You are about 40. I was 21 (white guy with light hair)
You're a really sweet, quiet, chinese gentleman. you had short black hair and we were headed to new york city from beijing on china air. it was march 2009.
i helped you write the customs paper. you told me you had a wife and a son about 18.
you were so kind and so charming, i got chills watching you when u fell asleep. i would have loved to be in your arms hugging you. i wish i asked you for your phone number but i guess you werent gay... oh i had such a good feeling though sitting next to you!
chills, you gave him CHILLS! (bird flu?) : pers-rwxmw-1578904149@craigslist.org

"More time at the gym"
Had a hot time with the 3 hot guys in the steam and sauna yesterday at the Prospect Park YMCA. Around 530. Would be hot to get together again. Made out with guy in the steam room and came and he tasted it. Would love to hang out again. Get in touch with me with a face pic and ill send mine back so i know it was you.
Glad to see everyone is keeping his new year's resolution : pers-amdfj-1580383491@craigslist.org

More Gym Drama
This isn't really a missed connection, as you introduced yourself when we were both leaving the Brooklyn Heights Equinox at around 10 on Thursday evening and we walked to Clinton together. I just wish now that I had asked for your number or given you mine. I don't know what the odds are that you will read this, but I hope you do or that I will run into you again soon--it seems likely as I've definitely noticed you at the Equinox many times in the past (as I think you are probably aware). Perhaps we can work out together some time, get a coffee, something? John
No need for a Missed Connection, patience John, patience.

Tranny Vocab Lesson 13 : Control Queen

2010-02-04T10:00:00.006-05:00

Control Queen [kuhn-trohl kween] noun. The kind of gay guy who's wound a little too tightly. This girl can't put down her Blackberry long enough to answer her iPhone even on Sunday, even at brunch. This one is obsessed with maintaining order, position, image, and self-image. No matter how small her empire, a control queen is the regent. She's got advanced stages of F.O.M.O. and "grass is always greener" disease. The poor thing can't bottom to save her life for her anal retentive compulsion.

In Context : The Control Queen abounds in New York. This city filled with entitled, over-achieving, up-and-coming power gays is a hub of control freaks all trying to climb the ladder. In an attempt to maintain power, the Control Queen displays characteristics that betray her inner insecurities : negativity, snobbery, and boastfulness. While every tranny in this city is trying to carve out her niche, transparent personality flaws are never cute. The cure for the common Control Queen : a psychiatrist, a power top and Blackberry deprivation therapy.

Best for Day 33 : The Bling Ring

2010-02-04T08:43:00.005-05:00

Crime pays, or so it has for the "Bling Ring", a tight-knit circle of celeb-obsessed teens who shocked Hollywood last year by breaking into the homes of some of young Hollywood's biggest stars. Sure stealing is tacky and wrong, but a lenient jail sentence, a featurette in this month's Vanity Fair and the kind of Patty Hearst-style coverage the "ring" is about to receive makes it almost seem worth it. Catch the group's alleged ring leader, Alexis Neiers, in her new E! show "Pretty Wild" this spring.

Binge 3: Snail Mail and Stationery

2010-02-01T15:59:00.003-05:00

Lord Byron didn't pen The Curse of Minerva on a MacBook, Oscar Wilde didn't woo "Bosie" through BBM, so why should a romantic gay icon such as yourself allow technology to do all the talking? Binge on the romance of the hand-written note. Trannies, ‘tis the season of love; the angst or St. Valentine is right around the corner and before you know it, your spring fever will be in full effect. Send that special someone a card in the mail and, who knows, maybe by February 14th you’ll be re-losing your v-card…

Best for Day 32

2010-02-01T13:38:00.007-05:00

To bring you all a Monday afternoon smile. Ga.kills.it at the Grammy's yet again, in this Armani one-of-a-kind frock paired the the McQueen Hoof boots she made infamous. Happy Monday kiddies!

Best for Day : When to pull the MTA Emergency Break

2010-01-30T13:22:00.007-05:00

Bureaucrat is often verbose and byzantine in construction, it's best when someone steps in to clear things up.

Don't Call it a Backlash

2010-01-28T18:10:00.005-05:00

"For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction." While Guys I Blocked on Grindr doesn't quite exemplify Newton's third law of motion, a blog dedicated to some of the doozies Grinding away on the iPhone's popular M4M sex app was inevitable. Like People of Walmart, GIBOG pokes fun at a subsegment of a subsegment of society, in this case, guys cruising for cock the high tech way. Beware trannies of Brooklyn, we doubt this was the kind of poking you were looking for when you downloaded this app.

Best for Day 31

2010-01-27T11:00:00.001-05:00

The one good thing shows like American Idol have given the gays - besides Kelly Clarkson - is a resurgence in amateur music. Nowadays it's OK to fag out over your favorite pop song and post it on Youtube. Case in point, these tweens who spent 42 long hours making a tribute to Gaga's "Bad Romance". So what if it sounds like a Blue Mountain virtual greeting card from the '90s, these boys are adorbs and from the looks of it, they will grow up to be very, very . . . "popular".

Binge 2: Gentlemanly Manners

2010-01-26T14:17:00.004-05:00

Time and time again, we at TTT see trannies pushing girls out of the way to catch the train, let doors go unopened, even take the booth seat at you favorite cozy two-top. As gay men, we owe the same courtesies to women as straight men (which are frequently ignored by them as well). In fact, it is often the heteros who look to us, setting the example. Give her the single seat on the subway, open her cab door and let her in first, wait for her to be seated at the dinner table and stand when she gets up powder her nose. Obviously, in large group settings, this is not always appropriate but ake it is from us, with all of your tranny drama, you at least owe it to her to feel like a true lady.

Purge 2 : Shit Lists

2010-01-25T10:54:00.004-05:00

Picture it: Saturday night at The Mothership, you're mid-sip on a vodka soda whilst in the early stages of courting that evening's sleep and scram when some livid queen appears and scream/slurs in your flawless face, "YOU'RE ON MY SHIT LIST." It happens all too often, a minor social blunder gets blown out of proportion by an overly sensitive homo resulting in a prissy bitch fit in a public place. Trannies need to reign it in and keep it real: if a dude blows you off, stands you up or forgets your name return the favor in kind. Walking around with a running tally of who's wronged you is no way to live. Forget the offense and forget that the dude exists -- or in the very least keep it to yourself, bitterness is never sexy.

Must See : Jeffery and Cole Casserole

2010-01-22T10:33:00.002-05:00

TTT has rediscovered Williamsburg boys' Jeffery Self and Cole Escola's show "Jeffery and Cole Casserole". The weekly Logo show is totally deadpan, totally non-sequitur, totally low budget and totally hilarious. You may recognize Jeffery from last week's "30 Rock" on which he played Liz Lemon's newly out of the closet cousin having big gay adventures in Manhattan. More amazing than that, he writes "Designing Women" fan fiction on his blog . Cole literally takes it there in every role and is a comedy genius. We suggest cozying up with your computer after lunch and enjoying the "Jeffery and Cole Casserole" shorts on YouTube.

Missed Connections 13

2010-01-22T09:30:00.004-05:00

We're going to go with Foxy on this one.

Ive seen you twice now on the train and I think you're straight, but meh, you never know. I saw you looking back towards me and my friend and we were trying to figure out who you were looking at. She is pretty foxy, so its anyone's guess. Or maybe you were just trying to figure out why we were looking at you. haha.

You're probably 5'10" to 6'. Reddish looking beard with reddish-brown hair. Orange shoes or orange and black runners. Anyhow, you always get off at Myrtle-Wykoff and maybe you should take it another stop one day. We could get off together. Zing! Oh yea, I am short, brown hair, beard, grey coat, few rings in my face and an all around rad guy.

A few rings in the face? You need to Wind your Neck : pers-kmeru-1561375982@craigslist.org

Are you insulated?

We made out for ages at Sugarland on Saturday. Your name is Will (I think?) and you bought a Red Stripe and then said you would be right back (giving me the beer) but never came back. I waited for a few but it was late and I had to leave. E-mail me if you get this bc I think you're cute and would love to get together.

Because you sound like a beer coozie! :pers-fwchr-1558475963@craigslist.org

Everyone should have limits . . .

I alwasy see you at gym. You are about 40 muscular with a belly and glasses. We made a connection twice once in the bathroom where i say your cock which is at least 9 inches and thick and today i saw you outside while i was in my car playing with my phone. Let me know if you were read this? Love to get together.

you should establish a few in 2010 : pers-ydvmb-1555677273@craigslist.org

At least your clothes are fresh . . .

Hey there. We were both just picking up laundry. I was ringing up and you came in and got your clothes out of the dryer. I was on the phone,work call and couldn't get off but sorry I didn't. I was wearing a baseball hat. Wish I said hello. Let me know if you read this.

because the 'busy with work' excuse is stale : pers-afz4y-1554779137@craigslist.org

Tranny Vocab Lesson 12 : Wind Your Neck [In]

2010-01-21T10:30:00.006-05:00

Wind Your Neck [In] [wahynd yohr nek in] verb. what you should tell anyone to do if they: a) be all up in your Kool-Aid; b) are completely out of line on a topic and need to be wrecked with; or c) just look like someone who needs to pull it back a few steps before they get a vodka soda splashed in their grill.

Appropriate Uses:
While engaged in conversations with friends who are infamous for getting out of line; when you're waiting for drink at Boiler Room on Friday night and someone tries to step in front of you; when you're on the L in the morning and some bitch decides to have a full-on conversation with their friend in your ear (BEFORE you've had your morning latte).

Example of Usage: "Did you hear what Alice said about Lady Gaga? I mean....she needs to WIND HER NECK [in]."

Close Cousins:
Reign-it-in; Check yourself

Note: If you're feeling extra ghetto one day, can be led with 'Oh no you di-int'

Shake Up in Fire Island

2010-01-20T21:24:00.004-05:00

Blogs from Queerty to Gawker are buzzing with news of the major real estate shake up in Fire Island Pines. Details are few but what is confirmed is that Eric Von Kuersteiner and his partner Tony Roncalli have a deal to sell basically everything at the center of FIP (the Blue Whale, the Pavillion, the grocery store, restaurant, gym, the only hotel in the Pines and rights to the Ascension party) for a cool $18 mil. The buyer is 23 year-old, Seth Weissman -- yes, twenty three -- pictured above, center. No one is confirming details on Weissman but rumor has it he's from a wealthy (clearly) Long Island family and possibly a hedge funder. The TTT editorial board has a combined total of 25 friends in common with Weissman on Facebook so someone must know something. All we know is that FIP has a new most popular boy!

**UPDATE**

New details have emerged. The buyer is in fact Scott Jordan Weissman. He's either 23 or 26, has lived in a $1.1 mil apartment in Gramercy since April 2008, originally from Rye Brook. UPenn grad, works for Perry Capital (for this guy), Goldman alum, donor to the Victory Fund. If funding for this deal comes through -- and working for Richard Perry, we're sure it will -- meet the new boy-emperor of Fire Island.

Best For Day 30

2010-01-20T10:54:00.004-05:00

Being locked in the dull drums of winter is no excuse for drab attire. Consider lightening up your cold weather wardrobe with a classic check. Best for both ladies and men, on shirts, blazers or even pants, check is a bold move in winter months.

Gaga Gives Back

2010-01-20T10:49:00.003-05:00

As Gaga told Oprah last week, she is dedicated to helping those in need in earthquake affected Haiti. You too can go Gaga in support of the victims of this devastating event by purchasing a Lady Gaga Haiti Relief t-shirt. All proceeds go to helping out those in need. Do it for the kids, do it for Gaga.

Best for University

2010-01-19T16:21:00.006-05:00

While we are accepting of all ivy alumnae and encourage their intermingling, TTT is unabashedly partial to one alma mater in the triumvirate. It is clear that the homos were behind the new Yale admissions video. Filled with song and dance-- this 16 minute "Glee"-esque cheese fest will clearly sway all the over-privileged, smart homos who weren't already planning to attend. Go Bulldogs! Woooooof. ;-)

Purge 1: Constant Facebook Status Uddates

2010-01-19T11:46:00.003-05:00

Speaking your mind is good for the soul, but sister, find the proper platform. No one wants a play-by-play of your moods via Facebook when they are just logging on to verify the location of a cocktail party. If you're of the "caring is sharing" mindset and feel the need to get the word out of your every whim get a Twitter. The mini-blogging site is made for sharing succinct thoughts: Facebook is for socializing. And when you join Twitter, be sure to add TTT: http://twitter.com/thetrannytimes

The Gen Y Hipster

2010-01-19T10:03:00.002-05:00

(click to view)Sociologists, marketers, pollsters and old folks are obsessed with us. We're an anomaly to the species; an entire generation of disaffected, distracted, entitled children in full grown bodies who are both envied and despised for our enduring ennui. Until recently, that was the prevailing wisdom on Gen Y but a new study is recharacterizing those of us who came of age in the aughts as movers, shakers, visionaries, uniters and, most importantly, doers. A new report by trend experts, Outlaw Consulting may change the way companies speak to it's sexiest demographic. Reframing Gen Y characteristics such as entitlement, making them potential positives, not negatives, shows a shift in perception of us cool kids:

“Millennials, or Gen Ys, are definitely different. They seem to feel more empowered – and more entitled– than any generation before them. They have an innate team orientation that makes them excellent collaborators. And the ideas about issues like marriage and career are radically different. Their “American dream” isn’t about the picket fence; it’s a flexible freelance career and a life defined by passion. … Gen Ys see themselves as change-makers. But they’re also busy trying to have a middle-class life, so their protests take different form than youth protests of the past. They see corporation’s as having lots of power but little heart, and they try to create change by using their dollars. The “aha” for corporations is to recognize that values and authenticity are important to this generation — and that directly affects how they spend. American Apparel, for example, has been totally embraced by youth because of its labor practices. Shopping there make them feel like they’re spending money in the right place. Companies that really “walk their talk” about core values will be endeared. If you want to be relevant to Gen Ys, you need to understand their mindset.”

Note, the second to last hipster is called "The Williamsburg". We're so 2000 and late.

Must See : Gaga on Oprah

2010-01-15T09:20:00.004-05:00

Tune in chickens, Gaga is on Oprah, today. A true tranny always checks local listings!

Missed Connections 12

2010-01-15T09:18:00.011-05:00

The Tranny Times believes in love. Whether it takes you to a Wainscot colonial with a white picket fence or to White Castle after the lights come up at The Mothership, we support men meeting men! As a public service, The Tranny Times trolls Craigslist Missed Connections looking for ads from the love lorn. Each week we collect the best.

Passing a by booty in the mensroom . . .
You looked like you were sticking your butt out to get my attention while you were washing your hands... There was little room to pass as I went to wash my hands...I pretended not to notice. Sr8t guy here, what was I supposed to do? Ok, so I am curious....
. . . puts the bi in bi curious. : pers-axfhg-1547472802@craigslist.org

OMG! WTF?! SRSLY? KIT!
I was with two of my girlfriends on the train, I checked you out i noticed you checked me. I got off at bedford. You spoke to my friend and gave her your number to give to me, but she accidentally erased it!! Id like to hang with ya, hit me up if you get this
Like totally the love of your life on the L train! : pers-cgdjt-1546304402@craigslist.org

The L train is for DL Lovers, too.
U latin dude riding the L train to Bklyn in the AM hours this morining with one of your boys, think your name is Ramos..Me good looking guy with lady friend checking u out..Want to make contact with U. .Sort of know U live in Canarsie....
What is this "Canarsie" you speak of? : pers-qmkru-1546104621@craigslist.org

Because hitting on patrons is tacky . . .
Hey.Mike...this.is.James...we.met.tonight.and.you.were.going.to.meet.a.friend.at.Flatbush.Farm.I.was.your.bartender
I.thought.we.were.vibing.pretty.well...and.i.regretted.not.giving.you.my.number...but.here.it.is....seven.one.four.three.
one.zero. nine.nine.six.five Call.me.if.i.was.right Hope.you.had.a.good.time.with.your.friend
I'm going to encode my basic information on an anonymous website. : pers-ct3wf-1546919161@craigslist.org

Must See : "Prodigal Sons"

2010-01-14T09:32:00.003-05:00

Critics are calling "Prodigal Sons", a new documentary, stranger than fiction. If the plot was summed up in a tweet, it would read: "Hunky high school quarterback turn New York lesbian filmmaker goes home to reunite w/ handicap adopted bro, biological son of movie stars!" Sensational, no? "Prodigal Sons" explores the universal theme of identity and its effect on the family through an exaggerated relationship between two estranged brothers each coming to terms with who he (or she) is. "Prodigal Sons" hits New York City screens in February and is sure to be a MUST SEE.

Shoes 4

2010-01-13T12:24:00.002-05:00

"You can always tell a tranny by her shoes." In "Shoes", TTT gives a stage to the foundation of any fabulous outfit: the boots, loafers, clogs and heels that we all put on each day.
For a second time, a pair of Stubbs has made it into "Shoes". Footwear is the most telling part of a man's wardrobe. These broadcast the sort of irreverent whimsy at home at any cocktail party.

Binge 1 : Nail Care

2010-01-13T09:19:00.004-05:00

The gentleman has enjoyed a good manicure for decades. While deemed by many as a feminine service, a well MANicured hand will be noticed by the right people whether it be whist reaching for the pole on a crowded subway or purchasing that Brioni cashmere crewneck at Bergdorfs. For those a little short on time or cash, FACE Stockholm has a great nail strengthener and cuticle softener ($16 each) which are user-friendly and will make a world of difference.