Tranny Treks: BALTIMORE

Ah Baltimore. Founded as a seaport town in 1729, this tranny enclave has been a hub for homo-delights since Washington trolled the docks for sailor-ass 250 years ago. Baltimore was the site of Revolutionary battles, Civil War skirmishes and a devastating great fire. It's also the salty spot that gave us John Waters, Divine, beehives and most of what Generation-Y Trannies identify as high camp. D.C.'s not-right stepsister, Baltimore is basically a B52s video come to life.


Below are brief observations observations of how B'more stacks up to Williamsburg:

Saturday evening festivities:
11211- Your boyfriend has friends in from out of town. Drinks, 8pm, at Hotel Delmano. Dinner, 9 pm, at Fiore. Home for after-dinner drinks, Lady Gaga remixes and a brief trunk show before retiring.

21224 - Afternoon drinks for 6 at a your Inner Harbor condo or Mt. Vernon townhouse. Dinner at 7pm at City Cafe. A shit-faced stumbled across the street to Grand Central for vodka, beer and cruising around 10:30pm. An Amy Winehouse amble across the other street to Club Hippo for last year's remixes and ex-boyfriend drama till 2AM.

Libation of choice:
11211- Something off Hotel Delmano's signature menu or a manhattan straight up. Wine at Fiore. Vodka soda at the trunk show.

21224- Two paths: vodka from happy hour to last call or beer all night long.

Tracks on the dance floor:
11211- Keep it cool, what's the name of this club? I don't remember but it's alright, a-alright, Just Dance . . . I’m gonna party, yeah, Cause anybody just won’t do, Let’s get this started, yeah Cause everybody wants to party with you . . .

21224- Pink remixes, Rihanna "Shut-up and Drive" club-dub, Journey remixes

Crowd:
11211 - You, your banker/lawyer/med school boyfriend, his married friends from college, both PhD students.

21224 - You, your lawyer/Reator®/nurse boyfriend, a Starbucks barista, his dentist-boyfriend, a Home Depot dyke and a community college drama major

But, the most notable difference.........
21224 - COMMUNITY UNITY! Gays in the 21224 are all part of one big LGBT pie. Nellies are friends with dykes, WAMRs (which abound) date guys with 401ks, Porsches share parking lots with F-150s and trannies dance with Emo girls.