Tranny Treks: ROCHESTER

Summer transplants can be found anywhere there is a shoreline and alcohol en masse. There are, however, a few other places to trek to. This Tranny Trek found a group of Trannies in Rochester, NY.

Rochester, home to the garbage plate, Kodak and hair gel, sits snuggly beside Lake Ontario.

Brief observations provided by zip code below:

Saturday evening festivities:
11211- Cozy dinner with two to three trannies followed by cocktails on your roof. A quick shower and change, and then you're off to the LES or EV for your weekend bar crawl - ultimately ending up at the Mothership.

14604- Grilled dinner with your fellow tranny's family, accompanied by a few magnums of white wine. A quick shower and a few vodka cranberries later, you head out in your Ford Focus to your ultimate destination, the Black Party at Tilt.

Libation of choice:
11211- Nice glass of red at dinner followed by a few vodka-sodas on the roof.

14604- Labbatt Blue Light

Tracks on the dance floor:
11211- Sugarland's own mix of everything pop and indie

14604- Christina Aguilera (circa 2001), Alanis Morissette remixes and 2007's Billboard Top 40

After Party:
11211- Random tranny you share a cab home with, romp with your newest trick, trunk show at your fellow tranny's apartment, etc.

14604- Last call is at 2:00 a.m. - clutch your pearls! The boys are prude, so don't expect to go home with a random tranny on the regular. The Rock is a sprawled out suburban oasis, so boys spend more time worrying about how they are getting back to their Mom's house than who they are going home with. Most after-parties consist of scarfing down a garbage plate and hopping in your fag-hags Chevy Malibu to get home to the 'burbs.

But, the most notable difference.........

The Wardrobe:
14604- Puka Shell necklaces and baggy jeans. I die! Boys in Ro-cha-cha are still rocking white sneaks, bootcut AE jeans and logo-emblazed tees.

God help them.

Must Hear, Must Have

Although we all deeply love Ms. Lady Ga, it's time to transition not only your closet, but your iPod to your Fall collection. Pure Pop will always be a tranny's sheer delight, but let's segway into fall with something a little slower than our summer jams. Don't worry, the below artists still offer us catchy melodies that are bound to stick in your head.


Let's start with something nice and easy (we all like that) to set the mood. Go download Diana Birch. This classy Kitty displays a keen resemblance to Joni Mitchell via your ear drums. She also assimiliates into the Karen Carpenter camp. Birch's latest album, Bible Belt, offers a smooth jazz voice over a piano and soul background. This isn't your Granny Tranny's jazz. Birch offers an updated twist on gospel fervor, doo-wop harmonies, country-blues guitar and classic AM radio-style melodies.



"Nothing but a Miracle"


"Valentino"


Now for something a bit more fast and loose, which we all lurve. Set your sights on Kate Earl. Ms. Earl gives us a little something fun to play with. With hints of Bossa Nova and chards of Pop throughout, Kate croons a present straight to your headphones. Light, airy and fun, Ms. Earl gives us something to chew on for fall. Think Jem, Amy Winehouse and Mandy Moore all jammed into one ear-bud.


"Nobody"


"Melody"

Binge & Purge: 3

Hola, Kitties. Here are your post-Labor Day binge-and-purge guidelines. Soak it up, Kitty-Kats! Binge on the below and for God's sake, please purge the latter block of resentment. Reign it in, trannies. Regin it in.

BINGE

1.Fancy Socks: Yes, its time to start wearing little booties again. It doesn't mean that your Thom Browne trousers have to go into storage just yet, though. A loud sock can be the perfect fall accessory (Paul Smith outlet in the Burg has great options) and add a little

smile to your step at last glance in your skinny-full length mirror. Nothing catches a gentleman's eye quite like a delicately decorated ankle transversing an L-station platform.

2. Happy Hour: As autumn sets in, take advantage of half price drinks and the ability to patio cruise without breaking too much of a sweat. A nice hump-day drink is best for sunset with co-workers and friends; time to put those late night binge-fests @ Eastern Bloc to bed for awhile.

3. True Luxury: If the downturn has taught us anything, logos do not mean luxury. These days, luxury items can be had for a song. When Bergdorf advertises a sale, you know there is a shift in the definition of lux. A true tranny enjoys clean cotton sheets, a well organized closet, and thoughtful meals in the company of good friends in his Billyburg loft. This is the time of year to binge on things that take time, care and consideration - not your Amex. Luxury is a mindset, not a price tag.

PURGE

1. Flip-flops: Not that any upstanding tranny would ever wear these around the city (you all know who you are!) , these tickety-tranny-flops are meant for the beach, around your parents pool and your buildings laundry room. Now that summer is over there is absolutely no excuse to see these on Bedford Ave. Was there ever?

2. Summer Getaway Spots: We all love our weekends at the beach, but it's time to brush the sand out yo weave for the season. Although the prices can be tempting, leave the Pines behind post-labor day; the only trannies out there should be the ones cleaning up your White Diamonds mess. Time to think about apple picking in Connecticut, New England B&Bs, and editing last season's ski wear.

3. Toxic Friendships: Zach, Kelly, Slater and Screech sang, "Friends forever, always will be friends," but where are those has-beens now? If you said, "Nowhere," you madame are correct. A tranny on the move cannot be weighed down by drama. People grow, and in doing so, friends often grow apart. If you find yourself constantly fighting, hating on one another's friends, hobbies, habits and hangouts, the gulf between you may be too great. Take a look around. It may be time to purge an ill-fitting frenemy, just as you would summer's seersucker shorts - for both your sakes.

Tranny Droppings 3 : Fire Island Edition

Well, well, well - one tickity-tack tranny sure had a fun time on the beach with his two-buck-chuck. Or maybe it was a post-tea rendezvous between a papabear and a tina-queen. Either way, save our beaches, Bitches! We don't care if it's Bollinger, babe, but don't pollute!

Twitter War of the Bravo Reality Superstars

Two of TTT's favorite reality trannies are duking it out on Twitter today. The Zoe and RHWONY, Bethenny Frankel are taking it to the Tweets! What will Andy Cohen say?!

Best For (Labor) Day 6

While on the return ferry from The Fire Island Pines to Sayville, NY on the very last day of summer 2009, it is best for day to dive into fall with canvas lace-ups, cuffed, dark wash denim and a striped shawl neck cardigan paired with your favorite Louis Vuitton Keepall 55 in limited edition Damier Graphite. Work a ferry ride!

Transville Weekend

Whether you are headed to low tea with your gaggle of gays or hobnobbing with your boss' decorator in East Hampton- Trannies, have a great last weekend of Summer '09!!!

Phoning in a Worst for Day

Uhhhh yeah . . . that's Sarah Jessica Parker. They're back: filming has begun for Sex and the City 2 : Menopausal Boogaloo. Apparently the actors are being mobbed by fans (tourists). Here are pictures from the shoot. Based on the clothes and luggage, I say it's a flashback to Carrie's early days in the city . . . if Carrie moved her as a spry, 57-year-old, crudely transgendered aerobics instructor. Did they travel to the future to film a flashback?! Get a new shtick already! Dreading the manufactured I <3 NY! cocktails! SHOES! mania . . .

Missed Connections 2

The Tranny Times believes in love. Whether it takes you to a Wainscot colonial with a white picket fence or to White Castle after the lights come up at The Mothership, we support men meeting men! As a public service, The Tranny Times trolls Craigslist Missed Connections looking for ads from the love lorn. Each week we collect the best.

Can you think of a WORSE scenario?:
You were walking with your son, wife and daughter on Bedford Avenue. We passed each other on the street. We kept on looking back at each other a few times. Let me know if you're interested in hanging out.
Maybe grab a drink at Chuck E. Cheese? pers-vwcvj-1355884171@craigslist.org

Call us when you grow a pair!:
We first saw each other standing on the platform waiting for the L train at Union Square. We both got on the last car of the train and stood next to each other. You were tall, thin, wearing jeans, brown shoes, a white shirt, tie, and a grey sweater. You were carrying a black bag with white Chinese lettering on the side. We bumped each other a bit getting off the train at Bedford Ave. You followed me up the stairs. Once outside, I got on a bus that was waiting, while you passed me, crossed the street, making eye contact with me again.
I REALLY regret getting on that bus, and I would love nothing more than to find you. You were beautiful. Send me a message, if you find this post. Please include a description of what I was carrying and what I was wearing, so that I know you are actually YOU. Thanks!
If you REALLY want to get into all this: pers-6kdhe-1355872434@craigslist.org

Confused and Forgetful seeks Creepy, Gross Guy with Staring Problem on the outer L:
You kept looking at me, I'm not really looking but you seem like a cool guy to hang out with. Hit me up. I forgot what you were wearing, I thnk shorts, you have spikeyish hair, and were eating or chewing something. I got off at mrytle/wycoff.
I really don't see the point but . . . pers-6mcjj-1350585104@craigslist.org

Really? A Dog in a Dog Park and No Date?:
You were at McCarren Park Dog Run on Sunday about 10:30 AM with your dog. You sat the whole time and both of my dogs kept coming over to you to be pet. I should have tried to say hi but I didn't. I had two big dogs - yours was happily chewing a tennis ball the whole time. Give me a shout if you are interested.
Maybe you two can go to Roebling Tea Room and not talk: pers-qr9d3-1349830782@craigslist.org

Tranny Vocab Lesson 5 : F.O.M.O.

Attention, kiddies - it's time to put on your thinking caps because Tranny Vocab is about to resume. In this series, The Tranny Times explores the varied and wonderful lexicon of Williamsburg trannies. Today's lesson is F.O.M.O.

F.O.M.O. [foh-moh] noun: Fear Of Missing Out: The phobia of missing out on something, anything, from a gift with purchase at Kiehl's to a secret Beyonce appearance at Splash, by not being ready, willing and available.

"Bitch has F.O.M.O. She's out every night watching the door, waiting for her dream top to walk in."

The "new" Chanel is Trannilicious

This just in! No kiddies, this is not a Lagerfeld wannabe, it is his most prized possession-- Karl's "muse" and protege Baptiste Giabiconi who recently appeared in nothing but Chanel pumps and the iconic 2.55 will appear on the cover of October's Wallpaper completely nude! Get ready trannies, Chanel may be best for evening but Baptiste is definitely best for day!

Best For Day 5 : Design your own @ Jonathan Adler

The brand new Design Your Own line from Jonathan Adler is, without a doubt, best for day.

Spotted @ Ramis Barquet Gallery

Jamie Treadwell, The Second Coming

Last night, aprivateclub.com hosted a gallery preview for New Art, NY at the Ramis Barquet gallery in Chelsea. Typically, the art was an afterthought: the opening was a white-wine fueled breeder buffet. While light on the gay, the party was heavy on the fashion.

It was a shoe crowd:

And a cute-girl extravaganza.
But there were a few trannies on hand . . . Spotted . . . Yalie and prep for all seasons, Rico Contenti . . . Mad Man/ad man Alex Carantza . . . PR socialgay and the creative director of Unruly Heir, Kristian Laliberte . . .

September Trannies

Kiddies, the fall has arrived, at least for a short while..... The air is crisp and the wind cut through the shade like a glance from Anna Wintour at a Mizrahi show. In igniting the spirit of NY's biannual fashion week, "The September Issue" revolving loosely around the making of the epic September Vogue issue- but more so on the dominatrix that is Anna and her tortured colleague, whose face once graced the covers of Vogue, Grace Coddington. This documentary gets trannys across the city back on fashion track and looking to see who they have to sleep with to crash the Marc after party. (did I mention Ga is hosting?)

Neil Patrick Harris, you better work a site dedicated to your hotness

Who ever thought Neil Patrick Harris would grow up to be such a hot piece? One of the few actors in Hollywood who is out of the closet and has a job and is hot, N.P.H. can Doogie our Howser any day of the week! Click over to Fuck Yeah Neil Patrick Harris for a celebration of Neil Patrick Harris' awesomeness.